Big Daddy Quotes with Sound Clips

Big Daddy

Funny quotes from the movie Big Daddy (1999), with short sound clips.

Actors: Adam Sandler (Sonny Koufax), Joey Lauren Adams (Layla Maloney), Jon Stewart (Kevin Gerrity), Rob Schneider (Nazo), Dylan and Cole Sprouse (Julian McGrath), Leslie Mann (Corinne Maloney), Joseph Bologna (Lenny Koufax)

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Yeah, when I was your age, I could eat anything I wanted. Wouldn't gain an ounce. Now, I have a chocolate shake, my ass jiggles for, like, a week.

Your Honor, my son doesn't have health insurance. He doesn't know how to boil an egg. He filed for Social Security at the age of 30. He is a drain on the economy, on the country and most of all, on me!

And you know what? We all love Yoo-hoo, especially Yoo-hoo with a little rum.

I ain't gonna rat you out. You know, puffing the cheeba. Go by the seesaw, smoke a j. You know what I'm talking about? -I have a bellybutton.

I'm not getting any handsomer, I know that. Every day I get a little bit older and balder and fatter.

Oh, yes, they make terrific pair. They went together like lamb and tuna fish.

That relationship's lasted a lot longer than I thought it would. -Look at his eyes, though. He's bored out of his mind. I give it two more weeks.

The kid is always around. The past three days he just never leaves me alone. You would think he'd want some privacy, but he doesn't. I'm in deep shit.

What do you need, a father figure? Stop pulling your sister's hair!

Ah, that's all right. But you gotta respect a place where the fatter you are, the cooler you are.

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