The Honeymooners (1955)

The Honeymooners (1955) poster

The funniest lines and quotes from The Honeymooners (1955) TV Series, with sound clips.

Actors: Jackie Gleason (Ralph Kramden), Audrey Meadows (Alice Kramden), Art Carney (Ed Norton)

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151 'I'm afraid it's bad news. A condition of arterial monochromia exists. This is a rare disease that usually affects only boxers.'
152 And as long as I'm an executive in that bus company, you are sure of being a bus driver as long as you live.
153 Can't you get it into your head that the boss is a human being just like anybody else? The boss... Ha!
154 Furniture? What do you wanna buy furniture for? We got furniture!
155 He's in the library. -What? -He's in the library. -Oh, he ought to be here soon. The library closes at 9:00.
156 Huh, look at this. Boy, this kills me. Bills, bills, bills. Why doesn't anybody send me a letter or something?
157 I know just what you're going through. When I was in the navy, boy, I'll never forget I had a headache like that once. Boy, pounding. Bang, bang, bang, bang, bang, bang, bang, bang...
158 I take off the same kind of things on my income tax: my union dues, deductible, I take off when I have my rubber boots vulcanized, when I have my lunchbox water-proofed, and I take off 25 percent of my rent when I use my apartment for business reasons.
159 I work for the city. -In what capacity? -Capacity? About 50,000 gallons a day. I work in the sewer.
160 I'll spell it. I'll spell it! -Well? Go ahead. -I'll spell it when you give me $16000, for spelling it!
 
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