24 Funny Quotes About Wine from Movies (+ Audio Clips)

Updated: Oct 27, 2025

A collection of funny quotes about wine from movies, complete with audio samples in mp3 & wav formats — great for ringtones or laughs.

1 Champagne is a great 'leveleler'... leveler. It makes you my equal. -Oh, I wouldn't quite say that. -Well, almost my equal.

James Stewart as Macaulay Connor in The Philadelphia Story (1940)

2 You know, champagne's funny stuff. I'm used to whiskey. Whiskey's a slap on the back, and champagne's a heavy mist before my eyes.

James Stewart as Macaulay Connor in The Philadelphia Story (1940)

3 Great. I could use a drink... Aah! Yes. Mmm. Feels like a 1470 burgundy. Not a good year.

Kevin Kline as Captain Phoebus in The Hunchback of Notre Dame

4 I have basic rules: I drink plenty of wine and I eat red meat and I take no students.

Lo Jui as Sun Yu Ting in Shaolin vs. Lama (1983)

5 550 dollars for this bottle, Tony. What do you think of that? -That's pretty good. For a bunch of _ing grapes.

Robert Loggia as Frank Lopez in Scarface (1983)

6 Is it real champagne? -No, it's diluted New Jersey applejack. The chumps will think it's vintage stuff right off the boat, bottled in France.

James Cagney as Eddie Bartlett in The Roaring Twenties (1939)

7 I only drink champagne when I'm lucky enough to get it.

Katharine Hepburn as Bunny Watson in Desk Set (1957)

8 Okay. I don't think I've ever drunk champagne before breakfast before. With breakfast on several occasions. But never before, before.

George Peppard as Paul Varjak in Breakfast at Tiffany's

9 Tonight you and I will celebrate, I'll drink champagne out of your typewriter.

Vincent Price as Burnbridge Waters in Champagne for Caesar

10 Perhaps I shall send Dom Perignon to your room. -I prefer to be alone tonight. Perhaps later I will meet your friend Don.