You're dearest friends. After your wife left you for the circus midget and Jack told everyone he drove her to New England to the diphtheria clinic.
10 seconds sound clip from the Last Action Hero movie soundboard.
You can hear this line at 00:35:32 in the Blu-ray version of the movie.
Quote context
[...]
- He'll do it again tomorrow. So what's your point?
- That cat is one of the best men I got!
- Yeah.
- Now who is this twerp? And why is that smile on his face?
- I just love the way you two fight, knowing how you really feel about each other.
- Pray tell, just how do I feel about this weird-looking sack of puppy poop?
- When he came back, you said, You saved me from public humiliation, Jack. You're my dearest friend.
- And you promised me you wouldn't tell.
- What's winning got to do with this?
- No! The very first Jack Slater.
[...]