337 Dark Humor Quotes from Movies (+ Sound Clips) - page 10

Updated: Jan 15, 2026

A selection of dark humor quotes with sound bites from famous or less known movies, as rated by our visitors, accompanied by short MP3 or WAV audio samples.

91 Care for a muffin? -No. -I baked them for the folks at the shelter. Didn't occur to me they couldn't eat them. No heads!

Kimberly J. Brown as Marnie Piper in Halloweentown

92 Remember that bastard who tried to molest you? I was angry, and I killed him.

Quote from Ninja vs. Shaolin Guards (1984)

93 So, what kind of agony do you have in store for me?

Peter Cullen as Eeyore in The New Adventures of Winnie the Pooh

94 I don't eat cats. It's too much fur.

Billy Joel as Dodger in Oliver & Company (1988)

95 So which way you taking? Suicide Trail through Nightmare Canyon, or the shortcut at Satan's Ridge? -Suicide Trail? -Good choice. More snakes, less quicksand.

Bob Newhart as Bernard in The Rescuers Down Under (1990)

96 I'd better find my other eye. -Where'd you leave it this time? -Someplace dark. And dusty.

Estelle Harris as Mrs. Potato Head; Don Rickles as Mr. Potato Head in Toy Story 3

97 There was the year we evicted the entire orphanage! -I remember the little tykes all standing in the snow bank! -With their little frostbitten Teddy bears!

Ebenezer Scrooge as Michael Caine in The Muppet Christmas Carol

98 Are you in unbearable pain? Is it inhuman? My darling, is it torture?

Raul Julia as Gomez Addams in Addams Family Values

99 While everybody else is opening up their presents, they're opening up their wrists.

Phoebe Cates as Kate Beringer in Gremlins

100 My earlier crimes were fine for their times, but now that I'm at it again An even grimmer plot has been simmering in my great criminal brain.

Vincent Price as Professor Ratigan in The Great Mouse Detective

337 Dark Humor Quotes from Movies (+ Sound Clips) - page 10

Latest Movie Sound Bites

Poll