337 Dark Humor Quotes from Movies (+ Sound Clips) - page 22

Updated: Jan 15, 2026

A selection of dark humor quotes with sound bites from famous or less known movies, as rated by our visitors, accompanied by short MP3 or WAV audio samples.

211 Stop! For the sake of show business. Stop and get shot!

Daws Butler as Snagglepuss in Snagglepuss (1961)

212 Mr. Management, what are you trying to do? Embalm us while we're still alive?

Harvey Lembeck as Harry Shapiro in Stalag 17 (1953)

213 Ist you all good little Nazis? -Jawohl. -Ist you all good little Adolfs? -Jawohl.

William Holden as J.J. Sefton in Stalag 17 (1953)

214 While in the Army, did you have any experience in procurement? -No. -Purchasing of supplies, materials? -I didn't do any of that. I just dropped bombs.

Dana Andrews as Fred Derry in The Best Years of Our Lives (1946)

215 What's that a picture of? -Bomb hits on Düsseldorf. Oh, that's my B-17.

Dana Andrews as Fred Derry; Virginia Mayo as Marie Derry in The Best Years of Our Lives (1946)

216 I'm underground? -Yes, dearie, three feet under. I dug it myself with my own two hands.

Jodi Benson as Thumbelina in Thumbelina (1994)

217 He looks dead. -Dead? Dead, schmed! What difference does it make?

Gilbert Gottfried as Berkeley Beetle in Thumbelina (1994)

218 Do you know what that guy does to beetles? Do you have any idea what he does? He stuffs them. He stuffs them and he pins them on his walls.

Gilbert Gottfried as Berkeley Beetle in Thumbelina (1994)

219 Romeo and Juliet were very much in love when they were wed. They honored every vow, so where are they now? They're dead, dead, very, very dead.

Carol Channing as Ms. Fieldmouse in Thumbelina (1994)

220 Have a rotten birthday! -Happy grouchness. -Yeah, get sick soon!

Mandy Patinkin as Huxley in The Adventures of Elmo in Grouchland

337 Dark Humor Quotes from Movies (+ Sound Clips) - page 22

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