207 Funny Quotes About Family from Movies (+ Audio Clips) - page 12

Updated: Sep 10, 2025

A collection of funny quotes about family from movies, complete with audio samples in mp3 & wav formats — great for ringtones or laughs.

111 Doctor, I'm in serious trouble. I'm married.

Tom Ewell as Richard Sherman in The Seven Year Itch (1952)

112 'Serious trouble. Married.' So far, absolutely normal.

Marilyn Monroe as The Girl in The Seven Year Itch (1952)

113 Marry an undertaker, marry a blackjack dealer, marry a pickpocket, but never marry a newspaperman. -That's why I'm making him quit.

Walter Matthau as Walter Burns; Susan Sarandon as Peggy Grant in The Front Page (1974)

114 You probably rented those children.

Meg Ryan as Kathleen Kelly in You've Got Mail

115 Having a kid is great, as long as his eyes are closed and he's not moving or speaking.

Adam Sandler as Sonny Koufax in Big Daddy

116 You fellas been doing a bit of boozing, have you? Sucking back on Grandpa's old cough medicine?

Jim Carrey as Lloyd Christmas in Dumb and Dumber

117 Oh, I don't know really. I just sort of do it. You see, my aunt said that spaceship guard was a good career for a young Vogon, you know. The uniform, the low-slung stun-ray holster, the mindless tedium...

Simon Jones as Arthur Dent in The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy

118 Your sister is very nice. -Ah, She's a pain in the burro, but she is my sister. She is very nice, she is. -Who? -Su hermana. -What? His sister. -Oh. Oh, yes, very nice.

Jan-Michael Vincent as Stringfellow Hawke in Airwolf (1984)

119 You know, I was thinking, if this kid has your good looks, you know, and your good brains and my good left hook, he's really gonna be something.

Sylvester Stallone as Rocky Balboa in Rocky II

120 Look, in tennis, you attack at the point of weakness. -But it was my grandmother. She's 81. -Honey, her backhand's a joke. I'm not gonna take advantage of that?

Renée Zellweger as Ken; Renée Zellweger as Vanessa Bloome; Patrick Warburton as Ken in Bee Movie

207 Funny Quotes About Family from Movies (+ Audio Clips) - page 12

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