Sir? I'd like to make a confession at this time. A few little items that I didn't put down on my income tax form. During the past fiscal year, I found three dollars that was floating by me in the sewer.

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12 seconds sound clip from The Honeymooners (1955) - The Worry Wart sitcom.

You can hear this line at 00:24:37.318 in the Blu-ray version of the TV Series.

Quote context

[...]

- On account, I didn't ever have any of those things, that he told me about, that I have to put down.

- I wouldn't cheat the government.

- Cheat the government?

- Well, certainly not, I wouldn't cheat 'em.

- I just didn't know about these deductions. You know, for instance, there was the horse with the clock in its stomach. There was the skinny chicken. And there was the three-legged race at the Racoon picnic.

- I didn't put any of that down. But I want to put it down now, and I want to pay tax on all of it: the horse and the picnic and everything.

- Well, that's very honest of you, Mr. Kramden.

- Sir? I'd like to make a confession at this time. A few little items that I didn't put down on my income tax form. During the past fiscal year, I found three dollars that was floating by me in the sewer.

- I want to thank both of you gentlemen.

- Now, you can list your additional income on this form here. Mail it in to me and I'll see that it goes on your record.

- And I want to thank both of you gentlemen for your honesty.

- Thank you, sir.

- Just like you to understand, that Ralph Kramden will never be accused of not putting a horse down with a clock in its stomach.

- I take off the same kind of things on my income tax: my union dues, deductible, I take off when I have my rubber boots vulcanized, when I have my lunchbox water-proofed, and I take off 25 percent of my rent when I use my apartment for business reasons.

[...]

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The Honeymooners (1955) Sound Clip

The funniest lines and quotes from The Honeymooners (1955) TV Series, with sound clips.

Actors: Jackie Gleason (Ralph Kramden), Audrey Meadows (Alice Kramden), Art Carney (Ed Norton)

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