Monty Python's Life of Brian Quotes with Sound Clips - page 7

Monty Python's Life of Brian poster

Check out some of the funniest quotes from Monty Python's Life of Brian, featuring soundbites and sfx. All the audio clips are in WAV and MP3 formats.

Actors: Graham Chapman, John Cleese, Terry Gilliam, Eric Idle, Terry Jones, Michael Palin

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61 No, no. Please. Please, please listen. I've got one or two things to say. -Tell us! Tell us both of them!

— (Graham Chapman)

62 Oh, what wouldn't I give to be spat at in the face! I sometimes hang awake at night dreaming of being spat at in the face.

— (Michael Palin)

63 Once in the sewer, timing will be of the essence. There is a Roman feast later in the evening, so you must move fast. And don't wear your best sandals.

— (Michael Palin)

64 Pilate? What's he want to see me for? -I think he wants to know which way up you want to be crucified.

— (Michael Palin)

65 Shhh. -Don't you shhh me. Eighteen years of total silence, and you shhh me! -What? -I've kept my vow for 18 years... Not a single, recognizable, articulate sound has passed my lips.
66 So there you are! I might have known it would end up like this. To think of all the love and affection I've wasted on you.

— (Terry Jones)

67 So, your father was a Woman. Who was he?

— (Michael Palin)

68 Stabbed? Takes a second. Crucifixion lasts hours. It's a slow, horrible death. -Well, at least it gets you out in the open air.

— (John Cleese)

69 Suicide Squad, attack!
70 Symbolic of his struggle against reality.

— (John Cleese)

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