307 Dark Humor Quotes from Movies (+ Sound Clips) - page 30

Updated: Oct 30, 2025

A selection of dark humor quotes with sound bites from famous or less known movies, as rated by our visitors, accompanied by short MP3 or WAV audio samples.

291 Why do we never see you? -I have all I need here. Drink and drugs and no friends. I've had too many friends.

George Sanders as Lord Henry Wotton in The Picture of Dorian Gray (1945)

292 Why someone would murder a 23-year-old college professor was beyond me. Maybe he delivered just one too many lectures on the Boxer Rebellion.

Lorenzo Music as Garfield in Garfield's Babes and Bullets (1989)

293 Put a bottle in his pocket and float him.

Malik Carter as Pinky in Black Belt Jones (1974)

294 Were. You really think he's... past tense? -Well, it certainly seems possible. -Oh, it would be wonderful.

Herbert Lom as Inspector Charles Dreyfus in Trail of the Pink Panther (1982)

295 Slow down. I know the men in that ambulance. -I don't. I have no desire to.

Noel Neill as Lois Lane in Superman (1948)

296 I'd like to give you a break, preferably a leg or an arm.

Kirk Alyn as Clark Kent in Superman (1948)

297 What are you doing here? How did you get in? That's trespassing! -No, it's not. It's breaking and entering.

David Hasselhoff as Michael Knight in Knight Rider (1982)

298 You don't think that she...? -Let's put it this way. If they hung people for circumstantial evidence right now she'd be slowly twisting in the wind.

David Hasselhoff as Michael Knight in Knight Rider (1982)

299 Somebody has got a real morbid sense of humor. I wouldn't go that far. -Morbid? -Sense of humor.

David Hasselhoff as Michael Knight; Patricia McPherson as Bonnie Barstow in Knight Rider (1982)

300 Someone made a tape of something dying or something.

Will Ferrell as Ricky Bobby in Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby

307 Dark Humor Quotes from Movies (+ Sound Clips) - page 30

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