Joan Rivers Movie Quotes & Lines – 20 Classics (+ Audio)

Find and rate the best quotes by Joan Rivers, selected from famous or less known movies, as rated by our community, featuring short sound clips in MP3 and WAV formats.

1 That was my Virgin Alarm. It's programmed to go off before you do.

As Dot Matrix in Spaceballs

2 Not in here, mister. This is a Mercedes.

As Dot Matrix in Spaceballs

3 What's going on? -It's either the Fourth of July, or someone's trying to kill us!

As Dot Matrix in Spaceballs

4 That was pretty good for Rambo!

As Dot Matrix in Spaceballs

5 My frog turned on me. -Yeah, I had some bad tuna myself.

As Miss Piggy in The Muppets Take Manhattan (1984)

6 Do you think I'm pretty? -Of course you are. You're more than pretty. -Gorgeous? -Don't push it, Pig.

As Miss Piggy in The Muppets Take Manhattan (1984)

7 Hey, wait! You forgot to get married!

As Dot Matrix in Spaceballs

8 Besides, he's got a sexy voice. He might be cute.

As Dot Matrix in Spaceballs

9 Cheekbones. That's what you need, Piggy. I mean, your face is a little round, no offense. I'm gonna give you a complete makeup job, okay?

In The Muppets Take Manhattan (1984)

10 You know what you need? You need eyebrows. -Pigs don't have eyebrows. -Well, this pig is going to! And so is this.

As Miss Piggy in The Muppets Take Manhattan (1984)