Joe Dirt: 40 Movie Quotes with Audio

Updated: Feb 23, 2026

Movie quotes spoken by Joe Dirt, ranked by user ratings. Listen online or download free MP3 and WAV clips.

1 You like to see homos naked?

David Spade in Joe Dirt (2001)

2 You see that moon? You don't know how many nights I spent alone staring at that moon wondering if at that exact moment, my mom or my dad was looking at the same moon. And for that brief second, we were together again, kind of, you know?

David Spade in Joe Dirt (2001)

3 You boys got something to say to me? Why don't you talk in the microphone?

David Spade in Joe Dirt (2001)

4 I got to find out what happened that day at the Grand Canyon. I don't care how long it takes. I gotta do it.

David Spade in Joe Dirt (2001)

5 Luckily, my neck broke my fall.

David Spade in Joe Dirt (2001)

6 She's your sister, dude. She's gotta be. And you made out with her, man! What's wrong with you, you pervert?

David Spade in Joe Dirt (2001)

7 I just didn't know you were in this witness protection thing, brother. I never would have said your name on TV, man.

David Spade in Joe Dirt (2001)

8 You wanna fight? Why don't you stick your head up my butt and fight for air?

David Spade in Joe Dirt (2001)

9 No, man, but you gotta keep going. What am I gonna do, quit? That's not an option. You got to keep on keepin' on.

David Spade in Joe Dirt (2001)

10 You're gonna stand there owning a fireworks stand and tell me you don't have no Whistling Bungholes, no Spleen Splitters, Whisker Biscuits, Honky Lighters, Husker Du's, Husker Don'ts, Cherry Bombs, Nipsy Dazers, with or without the scooter stick, or one s

David Spade in Joe Dirt (2001)