King Harold from Shrek: 14 Movie Quotes with Audio

Updated: Aug 1, 2026

Movie quotes spoken by King Harold from Shrek, ranked by user ratings. Listen online or download free MP3 and WAV clips.

1 Sorry! I hope I'm not interrupting, but I'm told you're the one to talk to about an ogre problem? -You are told correct.

Puss In Boots (Antonio Banderas), King Harold (John Cleese) in Shrek 2

2 I can hardly believe that, Lillian. I mean, really. He's the ogre. Not me.

John Cleese as King Harold in Shrek 2

3 Wasn't she supposed to kiss Prince Charming and break the spell? -Well, he's no Prince Charming, but they do look... -Happy now?

King Harold (John Cleese), Queen Lillian (Julie Andrews) in Shrek 2

4 So, I suppose any grandchildren I could expect from you would be... -Ogres, yes! -Not that there's anything wrong with that. Right, Harold? -Oh, no! No! Of course, not! That is, assuming you don't eat your own young! -Dad!

Shrek (Mike Myers), Queen Lillian (Julie Andrews), King Harold (John Cleese) in Shrek 2

5 Don't you remember when we were young and we used to walk down by the lily pond and they were in bloom... -Our first kiss.

Queen Lillian (Julie Andrews), King Harold (John Cleese) in Shrek 2

6 An ogre from a swamp. Oh! How original. -Well, I suppose that would be a fine place to raise the children.

King Harold (John Cleese), Queen Lillian (Julie Andrews) in Shrek 2

7 Fine! Fine! Pretend there's nothing wrong! La, di, da, di, da! Isn't it all wonderful! I'd like to know how it could get any worse!

John Cleese as King Harold in Shrek 2

8 Uh... excuse me. I'm looking for the Ugly Stepsister. Ah! There you are. Right.

John Cleese as King Harold in Shrek 2

9 Mmm... Exquisite. What do you call this dish? -That would be the dog's breakfast, Your Majesty. -Ah, yes. Very good, then. Carry on, Cedric.

John Cleese as King Harold in Shrek 2

10 I'm sure he just went off to look for a nice mud hole to cool down in. You know, after your little spat last night. -Oh. You heard that, huh? -Darling, the whole kingdom heard you.

King Harold (John Cleese), Princess Fiona (Cameron Diaz) in Shrek 2