135 Absurdity Quotes from Movies (+ Sound Clips) - page 3

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A selection of absurdity quotes with sound bites from famous or less known movies, as rated by our visitors, accompanied by short MP3 or WAV audio samples.

21 Lieutenant! Why weren't the original indictment papers placed on my portfolio? -Why, I didn't think those papers were important at this time, Your Excellency. -You didn't think they were important? You realize I had my dessert wrapped in those papers?

Groucho Marx as Rufus T. Firefly in Duck Soup (1933)

22 Dig trenches with our men being killed off like flies? There isn't time to dig trenches. We're buying ready-made. Here, run out and get some trenches. -Yes, sir.

Groucho Marx as Rufus T. Firefly in Duck Soup (1933)

23 What is it? -General Smith reports a gas attack. He wants to know what to do. -Tell him to take a teaspoonful of bicarbonate soda, and a half a glass of water. -Yes, sir.

Groucho Marx as Rufus T. Firefly in Duck Soup (1933)

24 I can't believe it. The Environmental Protection Agency is after me just because I bit a tree. It was a kite-eating tree. I only bit it to get even.

Michael Catalano as Charlie Brown in It's an Adventure, Charlie Brown

25 I'm doing a paper on Beethoven. Did you know he never played hockey? -He didn't? -No, he didn't. If he had played hockey, he would have written some hockey music.

Angela Lee as Lucy Van Pelt in It's an Adventure, Charlie Brown