309 Dark Humor Quotes from Movies (+ Sound Clips) - page 13

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A selection of dark humor quotes with sound bites from famous or less known movies, as rated by our visitors, accompanied by short MP3 or WAV audio samples.

121 Satan is our only hope. We're in league with the beast now, and we have to make a really big impression on him.

Adam Brody as Nikolai Wolf in Jennifer's Body

122 This same model has a glass bottom, so that when you hit a pedestrian, you can look down and see if he was a friend of yours.

Bill Thompson as Droopy Dog in The Tex Avery Show

123 But your aim on that second shot wasn't too good, baby. So there's just one thing that's stoppin' us: the bullet hole in my belly.

Humphrey Bogart as Ben in Love's Lovely Counterfeit

124 Raving psycho. Butchered 400 chickens and screwed a beagle. Taking him back to Nevada where he's wanted for banging horses.

Chris Farley as Mike Donnelly in Black Sheep (1996)

125 Yes. Poor girl. To have died so young without ever having experienced me.

Leon Greene as Miles Gloriosus in A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Forum

126 Yes, he's come back. Oh. Well, he's come back, but one of his fingers is missing. -Oh, I hope he didn't leave it anywhere embarrassing. -That's what I'm afraid of.

Kenneth Williams as Dr Orlando Watt; Fenella Fielding as Valeria Watt in Carry On Screaming!

127 Oh, nonsense. Living, she'd just have got old and fat. But like this she'll stay young and beautiful for ever.

Fenella Fielding as Valeria Watt in Carry On Screaming!

128 May I help you, sir? -Yes. I came to arrange about a funeral. -Is the funeral for yourself? -I beg your pardon? No. -I thought you might have come for pre-need counseling. Many of our friends like to plan ahead.

Robert Morse as Dennis Barlow in The Loved One (1965)

129 And now 'tis here... You'll lie. Here... Pickled in formaldehyde and... Painted like a whore...

Robert Morse as Dennis Barlow in The Loved One (1965)

130 Yes. I understand that you inter animals. -Yes. anything from a horse to a mouse. In the case of snakes over 6 feet, we insist that... they be coiled.

Robert Morse as Dennis Barlow in The Loved One (1965)

309 Dark Humor Quotes from Movies (+ Sound Clips) - page 13

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