The Jerk Quotes with Sound Clips - page 5

Funny and inspirational quotes from The Jerk (1979), with short sound clips.

Actors: Steve Martin (Navin R. Johnson), Bernadette Peters (Marie Kimble Johnson)

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41 There are some charity people here to see you, sir. -No! Send them away! There's a lot of people more deserving than me. -Ah, but these people want you to give. -Oh. Okay.

— Navin R. Johnson (Steve Martin)

42 Waiter! There are snails on her plate. Now get them out of here before she sees them. Look away! Just look away! And keep your eyes that way!

— Navin R. Johnson (Steve Martin)

43 What's your name? -Marie. What's yours? -I'll tell you tomorrow. It'll give us something interesting to talk about.

— Navin R. Johnson (Steve Martin)

44 Boy, I wish I could get that excited about nothin'.

45 Damn these glasses! -Sir. I can fix those glasses. -You can? Well, here, fix those suckers.

— Navin R. Johnson (Steve Martin)

46 Damn these glasses, son. -Yes, sir, I damn thee. -Damn.

— Navin R. Johnson (Steve Martin)

47 First I get my name in the phone book, and now I'm on your _. You know, I'll bet more people see that than the phone book.

— Navin R. Johnson (Steve Martin)

48 Give me a bite of that corn dog. -What about germs? -Put a rubber on it.

49 Have you seen a 5-year-old boy, blond hair, and he's wearing a T-shirt that says '_' on it? -No. There was just one kid earlier, had a T-shirt that said 'Life sucks' on it.

— Navin R. Johnson (Steve Martin), Marie Kimble Johnson (Bernadette Peters)

50 He hates these cans. Stay away from the cans!

— Navin R. Johnson (Steve Martin)

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