The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy Quotes with Sound Clips

The funniest lines and quotes from The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy 1981 TV Series, with sound clips.

Actors: Simon Jones (Arthur Dent), David Dixon (Ford Prefect), David Learner (Marvin the Paranoid Android)

7 more actors

, Peter Jones (The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy Book), Sandra Dickinson (Trillian Astra), Mark Wing-Davey (Zaphod Beeblebrox), David Tate (Eddie the Computer), Martin Benson (Prostetnic Vogon Jeltz), Richard Evelyn Vernon (Slartibartfast), Valentine Dyall (Deep Thought)

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1 And if we're unlucky? -The Vogon captain might want to read us some of his poetry first.

— Arthur Dent (Simon Jones), Ford Prefect (David Dixon)

2 Concert goers judge that the best sound balance is heard from large concrete bunkers 37 miles from the stage, while the musicians play their instruments by remote control from a insulated spaceship in orbit round the planet, or a different planet.

— The Hitchhiker’S Guide To The Galaxy Book (Peter Jones)

3 The history of every major galactic civilization passes through three distinct and recognizable phases: survival, inquiry and sophistication.

— The Hitchhiker’S Guide To The Galaxy Book (Peter Jones)

4 What's so wrong about being drunk? -Ask a glass of water.

— Arthur Dent (Simon Jones), Ford Prefect (David Dixon)

5 Drink up. The world's about to end.

— Ford Prefect (David Dixon)

6 'Gugenta 2005, super-chromatic, panel-sensitive sunglasses to help you develop a relaxed attitude to danger. At the first hint of trouble, they turn totally black, and thus prevent you from seeing anything that might alarm you.'

— Ford Prefect (David Dixon)

7 Any net imbalance between the amount you eat, and the amount you excrete whilst on the planet is surgically removed from your body weight when you leave.

— The Hitchhiker’S Guide To The Galaxy Book (Peter Jones)

8 Dead? No, we have but slept, for five million years. Nothing much seems to have changed. -Slept? -Yes, through the economic recession.

— Slartibartfast (Richard Evelyn Vernon)

9 Do you want me to sit in a corner and rust, or just fall apart where I'm standing?

— Marvin The Paranoid Android (David Learner)

10 Drink up! -Why three pints? -Muscle relaxant. You're going to need it.

— Arthur Dent (Simon Jones), Ford Prefect (David Dixon)

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